hello

I am new to the forum and would appreciate the advice of those of you that had had siamese for longer than I have.

My two arrived together, having been rescued from a life in a single room in London. They love their life in Sussex, I have a big house and they go out in the garden and I also work from home.

However, they have fallen out, Audrey, who is older, keeps biting and hssing at Betty, who does not appear to know what she has done. I wonder if they are fighting over my attention?

help! how can I encourage them to be friends again?

Vanessa, Audrey and Betty

How long have you had them and do you know how old they are? At certain points younger cats make a play to be top cat, and the top cat either lets them take it over, or puts them back in their place. If they haven't been with you for very long, then possibly the move bought that change about. Maybe having extra space gave Betty more confidence. Although the put down is noticeable the play for top cat isn't always as open and not something us mere humans would pick up on.

I am sure things will ease off, they just have to work through things themselves. In the meantime you could try a feliway plug in or two around the house. They emit cat pheromones and its supposed to help calm stress. You can get them from the vet, but online is probably cheaper somewhere like Vet UK or Best Pet pharmacy. They don't work on all cats, but they do on some. If you notice either one being too aggressive, you can try a time out too. 5 mins shut somewhere boring like a downstairs loo, just to cool off and that can work. They hate to be excluded from anything.

Hello Vanessa and welcome to SOCCC.

What a fantastic thing to do, to rescue two Meezer and give them a great home! Sorry to hear they are going through a rough spell at the mo, and hope you can offer you some help and support.

If Audrey and Betty are going through a pecking order issue right now, then I can only share with you my experience of having two cats who sometimes go through this. I have an Oriental boy and a Siamese girl. They love one another but their relationship constantly shifts from being peaceful to being like two squabbling siblings. At the moment we are going through a phase of civil unrest in our house and for the last week or so they have been driving me crazy with their constant bickering! They curl up together as normal, but when they are around us they can get a bit.....well, you just want to bang their heads together sometimes, if you know what I mean! Alaska, my girl, moans whenever Baggy (boy) walks anywhere near her and this in turn sets him into his mischievous mood of winding her up a treat, which then makes her more moany (she goes off like an air raid siren) and him more naughty. Sometimes it's just the case of her being a bit mouthy and him doing the equivalent of goosing her bum or throwing his arm over her shoulder and getting her in a headlock - but sometimes they get a bit too hands on and end up, not fighting, but there can be a bit of ham actor-like pushing and shoving.

This type of thing usually resolves itself on its own. Baggy is most probably going through a phase of trying to be over dominant with Alaska and she really doesn't like to be in second place so they end up having friction - although sometimes rather than fighting back Alaska seems to get a bit quiet and withdrawn. Normally Alaska will just snap and give him a damn good thrashing by cashing him around the house biting his ankles (he hates that) or she has been know to mount him in a sign of dominance. If this doesn't happen soon one thing that I need to do is take her and give her some one-on-one attention. This works a treat up boosting her self-confidence and giving her enough validation so that when Baggy tries to boss her about she puts him right back in his place. I will take her outside or upstairs to my bedroom and just fuss over her for a time and this seems to help her. I don't know if all cats need to have a pecking order as such, but they way I've found to keep harmony with my two if to make sure Alaska isn't dominated by anyone, as she doesn't do well in that situation. Baggy, on the other hand, is easygoing enough to be fine wherever he is the the family dynamics.

I have no idea if any of that is helpful or if I'm just blabbering on!

Oh dear, it does sound like Kim suggested, that they are simply vying for your attention and the position of 'topcat' status. I can't give any advice other than what Kim and Otters did already as for some strange reason our three never fall out.
We had 3 days of the usual hissy spitty way back when we first introduced Merlin to Billi, then another 3 days of similar behaviour when we took Minnie in aged 10 months as a rescue but since then they have all been the very best of friends, and either they are outside/indoors chasing and romping about, or fast asleep somewhere in the many beds we have littered about the house, sometimes all three together, and sometimes they split up and sleep seperately.
I am sure that you will have lots of great ideas from everyone, we have lots of members and lots and lots of beautiful furry people too.

Hi Vanessa and welcome.

How wonderful rescuing to meezers. I can only offer advice as an owner. Audrey and Betty have gone from living in a cramped flat to having a paradise of space and maybe this has something to do with a change in their behaviour. We don't know what the dynamics were in their flat but perhaps now they have room to 'breathe' and develop their personalities one may feel she should be top cat. If you haven't had them long the new suroundings, home and owner will certainly bring changes.

From what you describe it doesn't sound like nasty fighting, more of a bickering. I have three cats - boy and girl ori's and one boy meezer. They are aunt and nephews and auntie certainly keeps them in check. If the boys especially Ned my ori, get a bit too cheeky she's not adverse to giving them a whap on the head, nip on the cheek and a hiss she also bites their ankles. Sometimes when they've done nothing too, typical woman They also look at you as if to say "what did I do". Caffreys is my very placid but solid meezer and he is quite happy to let Ned think he's the big cheese. But...Caffs does also play the dominance card every now and again by mounting Ned and biting the scruff of his neck. It all goes on but there's never been any falling out.

Don't know if this is much help but hope that hearing what goes on in other multi cat homes eases your mind a bit. I think keep an eye on them, hopefully they'll sort themselves out without too much fuss and you can enjoy life with two super cats. Certainly give both of them equal and lots of fuss and cuddles, works wonders for everyone

When I got the girls as babies, it was hissy spit central here I just gave every one a good bath and dried them with the same towel and they have been good friend since them although Taz get's it in his head to push Sabbath around much like Baggy does Ms Alaska, and that will start a pissing contest untill usually Ming toy intervenes on behalf of her sister. Funny thing is Taz will not try to push Ming around, just Sabbath I think it's because he enjoys making her yell at the top of her lungs...(which brings Ming Toy running to her defense.) BTW, hello and welcome, i'm Gina..

Hi and Welcome,
Maybe you can play with some cattoys ...with a little bit of patience they want to play and then you let them have nice positive contact...maybe that will work...that,s how I introduce cats to eaghother..

Hi Vanessa,

Welcome to the group

I do hope your two settle down soon and put their differences aside.